Take care how you speak to yourself because YOU are listening!
A very happy and healthy Tuesday everyone. (I know, I’m late this week, but I really didn’t feel like doing much of anything over the weekend, I was feeling a little lousy, and as a result my writing suffered) I am writing though, and I am still in January, which means I have managed to keep current on my blogging for the entire first month of 2017! Yay me!
I think that self-praise is quite crucial in anything you do, don’t you?
Over the years I have learnt that having the ability to praise yourself is so important, and so many people don’t understand this, or they feel it hovers on the line of narcissism. I assure you, that’s not what this is… although I do come across that way from time to time. I almost find it easier to recognize my own efforts than take compliments from others (this is where it comes across sometimes as though I am a little narcissist)
My Boss: “What in the world would we ever do without you?”
Me: “I know right, this place would fall apart without me!”
Random interviewee: “Your company seems really professional, and even you, Samantha, have been such a pleasure to deal with!”
Me: “Oh I know, it’s because of me that all of this happens!”
Yes this is really how I react to compliements… needless to say, I often get strange looks from those who are less versed in sarcasm, and it’s not odd for someone to come to me months later to tell me that their first impression of me was slightly off-putting, that I came across as arrogant or, imagine this one…. Full of myself. I don’t intend for this to be the case, really I am very down to earth, but I just don’t take compliments or endorsements well, and sarcastic self-affirmation is a wall I use to withstand the awkwardness of compliments.
I digress; however, I have taught myself to recognize a job well done in my own work, and to applaud myself.
I do, on occasion, penalize myself when I miss a target or fall behind in things, but for the way my own brain works, rewards are much more effective. All this being said, I have satisfied the first month of my quarterly goals, or most of them – though I still do feel guilty when I have left my work in progress to the side and chosen to soak in a bubble bath instead of writing… oops!
So yeah… one month complete! You Rock Samantha! How ever do you do it? Wowza you really are an all-star!
Why thank you! (Insert curtsy here)
I think self-acknowledgement is something that one should learn to practice daily. I joke, and yes, in my day to day life, I am quite sarcastic about how truly amazing I am, but as I wind down at night, I do still find myself chastising what I have done that has hindered my progress, or what I haven’t done to advance where I am. This applies to all aspects of life.
“Your husband did the dishes tonight, you’re falling behind as a good wife!”
“Why are you laying here reading someone else’s work when yours sits wordless!”
“Why in the world would you have eaten that one stupid cookie, could you not have just walked away?”
“Seriously, how long would it take to do 50 push ups! You’re so lazy!”
Self-doubt sneaks up all the time, and our only way to combat this, most of the time, is to remind yourself of all the great things you are accomplishing on a day-to-day basis.
“Awesome job today! All to-do’s checked off and highlighted! Productive!!”
“Yes! Exceeded word count today! You can do this!”
“Not to stress about dinner… you remembered to pull it out of the freezer this morning! You’re an all-star wife!”
Be grateful for the things you do daily. Be humbled when you don’t measure up, but find ways to praise yourself when you do accomplish things large and small. I am still a long way from finishing my quarterly goals, I still have two months to go… it seems like forever away, but I know how quickly January flew by, so I know I will be here before I know it, though I have so much to be proud of at this point with the progress I have made.
Friends and family are great support systems, whether you are on a journey to lose weight, training for a marathon, striving for self-improvement, writing a book, lion taming, trying to find a way every day to give back, improve your financial situation, start a company, win a food eating contest… (I’m reaching here to try to prove my point that it doesn’t matter what you are aiming for – you have people to support you… are you with me? Have I just listed your goal! It was lion taming wasn’t it? Please be safe out there, they have sharp claws, but once tamed, give me a call, I have always wanted to cuddle with a lion!)
No matter how many people in your life support what you are trying to do, and no matter how much praise they give you, they will never be as passionate about it or as invested in your own goals as you will be. Why should your only affirmation be that which is given from someone else, while you let your own self doubt eat away from the inside?
Be. Your. Own. Biggest. Fan!